Is Perimenopause Turning Your Type A Into Type Meh?
As a type A person going through perimenopause (like me), have you noticed your capacity to give it your all leaking out of you at an alarming rate? Is your go, go, go... gone, gone, gone?
Before we get into this, let’s start at the beginning. What exactly is a type A person? See examples below on how to spot us in the wild:
You arrive, on time (or most likely, early) at a class you signed up for with all the supplies you were told to bring (you’re certain of this because you double-checked the required list umpteen times). As you sit waiting patiently for the class to start, you notice those who wander in, empty-handed, looking confused and disoriented. You direct them to the agenda, outline or any other orienting piece of information and invite them to choose a seat and get comfortable. And you are NOT the teacher.
You plan ahead for holidays; usually a six week window is as close as you’ll cut it. You contact relatives and friends, design the menu, write the ingredient list and choose the decorations. You send reminders, assign menu items and accommodate those who are gluten free, vegan or vegetarian. You don’t just provide alternatives, you read books on how to prepare these foods and make some of the best versions the guest has ever tasted!
If you go to a self-help retreat or healing session and there is an accompanying book, you’ve read it. In fact, you highlighted all your fave quotes and suggestions. You’ve done all the pre-requisite meditations, visualizations and exercises AND the optional ones.
Reading over these examples, my heart is bursting with pride for us type A warriors out there! We are killing it!
So, what do you do if your boundless enthusiasm, organizational prowess and earnestness for life’s big adventures goes by the wayside? How on earth do you deal with it when your taste for delicious excellence wanes?
For example, you find yourself saying, “Oh well. Maybe I’ll skip the introductory lesson for my program.”
Or
“I’ll just let someone else plan it out this time. I don’t have the energy.”
I mean, what the hell? This is not like you at all!
Maybe the change snuck up on you. One day you wake up and it feels like you’re wearing a lead suit. Or taking on one more thing will collapse you. And this confuses you to no end.
For so many years you’ve taken it all in stride. “Sleep when you die,” and all that. If you had an ounce of energy you poured it into what was required of you and beyond. This doesn’t feel like the answer any more. You’re still conscientious, reliable and caring. You want to do the right thing and experience life to the fullest. Yet, the old you doesn’t feel quite right.
This is a part of the journey back home to yourself and it’s something to celebrate. To help with the expansion into more of your true self, I offer you these reframes.
Whether it’s the declining estrogen or another round of adrenal fatigue, is it such a bad thing that you let a few bouncy balls drop? What would really happen if you allowed your arms to metaphorically fall to your sides, releasing the balls from your hands, to bounce off the floor and whizz past your ear on the way into the stratosphere?
You could become the type A of zen. Or sleep. Or rest. Can you become the most relaxed, rested, laid back version of yourself? Wouldn’t that require you to dig deep and master this version of you? Turn your energy, focus and commitment towards nourishment, rejuvenation and doing things just because.
I bet if you applied yourself you could become the most zen, chill type A person out there. And even enjoy the process!
What type A skills can you apply to nourish and shower yourself with self-care and self-love?