Here is How to Clear Old Relationship Patterns to Have Empowered Love in Your Life
These self-exploration exercises will help you get to the root of your patterns and dynamics so that you can improve your current relationship or attract a more loving and empowered relationship. In other words, answer the prompts either from current situations or your most recent or relevant relationship.
Be Truly Aware
I know it sucks and it’s not easy, but we need to see how we are perpetuating our own patterns in relationships. I’m not blaming the victim here: if you were abused it is NOT your fault. What I’m saying is that as an adult you have the ability to develop discernment and recognize warning signs of a relationship that may not be a loving or fulfilling one.
How many times have you had red flags about a relationship and you ignored them and pushed forward, only to have it turn out to be just like your last unhealthy relationship?
What is the theme in your relationships?
- Emotional feeling: what is the dominant emotion within your relationship? Betrayal, sadness, discomfort? Take note of this
- Dynamic: how do you interact with your partner? Are you the one to initiate closeness in communication or do you clam up and your partner is trying to speak to you about uncomfortable topics?
- Roles: what is your role within the partnership? Are you the nurturer? Do you make the plans? Are you the talker?
Be Truly Accepting
Is there something about yourself that you just can’t forgive? Do you have traits about yourself that you don’t like and are constantly trying to hide? What about your partner: do they do or act in a certain way that you are unable to be with without trying to change?
When Did This Discomfort Start?
- What can’t you accept about yourself? Or your partner?
- When did you first feel this way about yourself?
- Who does your partner’s behaviour remind you of?
From this knowledge make a decision if you’re able to live with yourself and let it go (same as with your partner) or whether you want to get help to resolve it. It starts with a decision to empower yourself rather than dragging resentment around with you.
Be Truly Connected
When you don’t feel connected to yourself you can experience all kinds of issues from anxiety to confusion and tiredness. You might feel less confident and likely to speak your truth to others. You aren’t connected to the inner part of you with all the answers. That causes doubt and feelings of low self-worth.
How connected do you feel?
- What is your favourite trait about yourself?
- Do you know your emotional triggers?
- Do you know what ignites joy within you?
If you don’t know the answers to these questions spend time getting to know yourself. This leads to feeling more connected, confident and clear about what you want. In turn this leads to better communication with others and getting your needs met in life.
Looking for more support in a community of other empowered people pleasers in the making? Join my community! It’s completely free, and I share healing and empowerment techniques, strategies and stories on how to attract people into your life who will love you for who you are! Think of it like home, where you can relax and geek out on self-empowerment. Join below: relationship empowerment for people pleasers
